Ladders

 

It is the right tool for the right job.

Need to get something above your reach? Need to get down in a hole?

You need a ladder.

There are step stools, extension ladders, wooden ladders and aluminum ladders.

In the summer when home renovations are happening like window replacements or roof replacement or tree trimming or exterior painting, there is a need for ladders.

You can hear them as the white trucks drive up and down the road. Since you can’t pack them in the trunk or fold them up, they have to be placed on top or on a rack in the side secured with bungee cords and rattling about.

A ladder takes up depth but can’t be stuffed into small spaces. They can be leaned up next to the fence or shoved up under the house crawlspace or just stumbled over in the yard.

No what you need a ladder for; you always need another one.

A step stool doesn’t reach what you need; a stepladder is too tall, an extension ladder is so heavy and footstool is too small.

I’ve got many ladders. I’ve got ladders I’ve bought. I’ve got ladders that have been left for me. I’ve got ladders that are scattered through the yard. Painters have left ladders. Power trucks left ladders.

Ladders are too big to fit in a trashcan. Ladders are just awkward to store.

The other day my neighbor was replacing their windows. To do so, required ladders. Unfortunately there was little space between the houses to angle a ladder to climb.

I’ve now got a 25’ heavy-duty extension ladder (left over from painters), a 15’ extension ladder, an 8’ ladder, a 5’ ladder, two double-step stools and a single footrest.

I should be able to reach it, but I’m afraid of heights.

Show & Tell

 

Now that summer break is over, who is going first to stand up in front of the class and tell what they did for the three months?

Did you go on a vacation? Did you go to the mountains and hike up the dirt paths and into the poison ivy and get chased by a bear? Did you go to the ocean and only tip your toe into the water because you know a big shark is out there ready to eat you up? How was your sunburn? What is better than sitting in a sandbox in the wind? Did you travel to another land to see the locals dress up in funny outfits to sell you trinkets and too expensive food that will have its affect on your tummy? Did you have any Karen’s in the airport or better yet, on the plane that you could video on your phone and post on Instagram? Did you get lots of pictures of old broken-down buildings now called relics? How many tee shirts did you buy for the grand kids? Did you visit the ancient sites like museums and gawk at the ruble that used to be mankind or perhaps wander the clean chateau halls of modern creative culture displayed behind velvet ropes? Did you take those long road trips with exuberant gas prices? Could you afford to send your kids to summer camp or just let them stay home with their screens to practice for school? Did you watch your stocks fall? Did you watch your grocery bill increase? Did you go shopping or wait until the Christmas discount sales start? Could you find the product you were looking for or even order online and wait because the ships were backed up in California? Did you decide to take up exercise like walking but found it too hot and decided to stay home and let your dog poop in the neighbors yard? How many apps did you download? Did you read a good book(s)? Did you write a book? Did you go to a festival concert with some second hand wannabe or a left over from a forgotten past to drink warm beer or eat some horrible food from a roach coach? Hope your wore your mask? Who in the family got ill or broken? How long were you on your phone talking to your mother? Did you check your office e-mail? Did you have any forest fires or droughts or floods or hurricanes or some disturbance of the grid from outer space? We zapped that asteroid for three million dollars. Did you take the family out dinning for a plate presentation that cost you more than your mortgage? Could you find a place that was still serving? How much did you tip? What shows did you binge watch? Did you stream the movies the social media recommends to stay up-to-date with the current speaking points? Did you get bogged down in the politics or the invasion of another country but realize we do the same thing and it never ends? Do you know who is running in the midterms? Have you checked your library for ‘inappropriate’ books? Have you discussed with your child’s teacher what the curriculum should be for the following year? Did you take your latest booster shot? How much did you drink? Have you bought a gun yet? What did you cut back to save the environment or is that the other guys problem? How does your water taste? Does your spouse know you are messaging that other person? Are you concerned that you could come under an atomic bomb attack? Duck and cover?? What was the best recipe you found and cooked but it didn’t turn out right? How many loads of laundry did you do? What chores did you put off for another summer? Did you make a new friend? Did you learn another language? Did charge your battery? Did you change the battery in your smoke detectors? Did you write a poem? Did you take your pills? Did you say, “Thank You”? Did you change your hair color? Did you change your identity? Did you change your partner? Did you change your socks?

Now it is getting to the time of lowering the windows and checking the thermostat. The sweaters come out and the little boy pants get put away until next spring when the flowers start to bloom and the birds sing and the entire world is aglow with sunshine.