You can choose
your friends but you can’t choose your family.
To declare
before I begin, I was part of a family (of course) but never had a family.
Born after WWII
probably as a “uh oh” child, I had a set of parents who provided for my
education, clothing, substances, value structure, and enough entertainment
provisions to keep me out of trouble.
I have no
complaints with my growing up in that family, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to
have my own.
There is that
legacy thing where you pass on to your sires the history of the family name or
the accumulation of wisdom and experiences through the generations.
There is also
that responsibility thing of providing for your offspring. Perhaps I’m just too
selfish so I was always a couple.
Then again, family
is what causes the most discussions and problems. The family and the extended
families are your first friends and teachers. They teach you manners and the
fine points of etiquette, get you out of diapers, take off your training
wheels, come to your birthday parties, teach you how to surf before throwing
you out of a plane, dress up to go to family socials and religious gatherings,
become topics of flattery as trophy awards, and then slowly fade away.
Families also
present the crazies and the sweetness of human personality. Though I didn’t
learn financial structure through family, money problems can bring families
together. Emotional roller coasters can be absorbed by families or ignored.
But with all
their swings and sways, families are a large part of what makes you “YOU”.
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