Grieving Eating

Everyone grieves in his or her own way. Still the shock of death draws others to your comfort and showing there emotional connection and heartfelt sympathy for your loss.

And they bring you a plate of pasta.

While he or she is trying to figure out why there is one less at the dinner table, friends and family and religious leaders and morticians work through the process of preparing the body for disposal and keeping the family fed and hydrated (and medicated if necessary) until the big party.

The wake brings everyone together to view the corpse and say the last ‘good-byes’ before gouging on the buffet assembled for all to partake (except the dear departed).

During this period of adjustment, food is the last thought. Still the body needs to consume enough stuffs’ to survive for the next day and the next day.

Fine considerate people send flowers and cards for there is nothing else they can do. Neighbors and close friends will bring over dishes of prepared pasta or salads or a nice sandwich plate with Dijon mustard.  They never bring you ice cream and pie or a MacDonald’s gift card.

Depending on the age, spirits are provided to numb the pain.

Not a real fan of the formal ceremonies of placing the box in the ground, soon the best wishes and concerns go back to their lives. Still one must eat.

After all the flowers have wilted and the lasagna pans are empty, the search for sustenance continues.

If the passed was the one who made the grocery list, searching the aisles becomes a new adventure.

Even with all the utensils, experience and recipes cooking a meal can become a struggle. Shopping for one means there will be leftovers and be thrown away as they rot in frig.

There is an interesting trend that meals are selected that the long gone beloved liked. If it wasn’t a personal preference, it is a connection with the departed.

Some cultures bring food to the graveyard to place with candles and chants. I understand taking a bottle of wine and toasting to the fore longed soul but don’t know how you relieve yourself on the headstone without be sacrilegious. Leaving a box of pizza in the dirt is only going to attract wild dogs or hungry gravediggers.

Like adjusting to the lack of the presence of a being in your space, the choice of what and when to eat is up to the survivors.

Would like fries with that?