Have you
checked your wallet recently? Probably not with all the methods of cyber coins
used now, but it you did… what would you find?
Paper bills.
Green backs. These are printed pieces of paper with some old dead president on
it and a big number that indicates its value to another. Some call this cash.
Take a look…
A dollar is
six inches by two and a half inches, printed on both sides with a green tinge
to it. Pay used to be waiting for the boss to hand out these bills for a week’s
work or a day’s pay. Then you got a piece of paper you had to take to the bank
to get some of this money you could trade to the market for dinner or the
bartender for a pint.
Once direct
deposit was created, all those with bank accounts just asked the teller if
their pay had arrived yet.
Money, as it
is called, is an intricate design with swirls and crosshatching all carved in
metal to withstand the amount of bills to be printed.
The first
dollars were simple black on white paper but as soon as they started getting
counterfeited, different designs and colors were added. The weave of the paper
was changed and through the years little quirks were added to elude the best
copy.
Green seemed
the most popular color, but like military script, the colors could be changed
every so often to avoid the enemy from robbing the bank and buying more
bullets.
Still the
same old presidents are on the same old bills and that is not keeping up with
our cultural change.
Why not add
some new faces to our money?
How about
changing Ole George on the buck for the King? Would you collect more dollars if
they had your idol on it? Thank you.. Thank you very much. Instead of the
George sawbuck, it could be the Elvis hound dog.
How about a
two-fer for Dolly? She is an American legend and more good ole boys will be
stuffing their pockets while singing Jolene. The new bill could be the Dolly
double.
Why should
Lincoln be on the five spot? He’s got a monument. He’s got a highway. What
about those other presidents that people have forgotten? We got plenty. How
about Tricky Dickey? We got plenty of memories about him. Maybe the Crooked Kroner
could value a dollar less so you always need more than one?
One of the
most popular bills is the ten. Since nothing cost less than $8.79, carrying a
Jefferson will get you some more change. It is adequate tip money but two are
more impressive. Here again, Jefferson is on the quarter. He’s got a monument. He’s
got Monticello. He’s got the Declaration of Independence. I even went to his
high school, so let’s find another find American face to put on the money. Jimi
is a true American icon and probably wouldn’t mind having the advertising.
Maybe it should be in day-glo? Can you roll it and smoke it?
Jay makes us
laugh. Let’s slap his big mug on a twenty. Maybe we can change the name to a
Jayroll? He even looks like Jackson and who wants to keep that guy around any
more?
Why do the
images on our money have to be depictions of people? Why can’t they be the
almost national bird if Ben Franklin had his way? If we put a cartoon on the
money maybe more kids would want them. If we tell our next generation they have
to work to earn this turkey, production may increase? Maybe just an outline
they can color in crayon?
Dolly might
break the glass ceiling, but we need to have a woman who really knows how to
make money. This would also cross the color barrier (in case you hadn’t
noticed). If you earn enough Opra’s you can give away cars.
Why does the
image on the paper money have to be a person? How about a brand? Think how much
a company would pay to have their logo printed on money? They would become
coupons you have to spend at their store. How many iBucks does that cost?
If
commercialism is getting too far a field, lets get back to patriotism. The red,
white and blue. American eagle. 1776. Old glory. Put a symbol on the paper we
can all be proud of. Lady Liberty dollars would make you proud to spend your
money, unless you are opposed to immigration or the Planet of the Apes.
Even though he too has a monument and a
speech and even a holiday, we should show some respect for another king. A bit
pricey but, something to aspire to.
I think this
is the largest denomination of cold hard cash there is, but I could be wrong.
Maybe there is a million dollar bill with Trumps face on it? The way the
government prints money (they are the only ones allowed to) and the way they
spend the bucks, we may need a trillion dollar bill soon?
There are
also coins but unless you don’t have your smart phone or credit card, the
jingle jangle of change just weighed you down and never came up even.
Maybe the
change is happening?