A December Sunday afternoon. Sunny
but cold. Back from the store after filling the bags with comfort food and
settling down to football and beer, little music, and SMACK kill that flying
gnat.
But a few thoughts keep rumbling
around this season.
Every December brings thoughts of
the year past. The hot summer nights, the spring flowers, the fall leaves, the
cold of winter. But this year has been different.
The first day of this year was the
most incredible day I have ever had. But enough about that for now.
This 2008 year has been an ever
tensing economy, realization that the secure industry you have worked for 38
years is sinking fast. Friends and colleagues day-by-day disappear. The cost of
doing business.
The other day, I took a day off to
control my once-a-year cold. The next day the newspaper printed that 18
employees were laid off.
"Do I have a job? Do I go
back to work?"
So I peddle down to work, looking
at the old sites and start to contemplate.
"What would I do if it is all
over?"
Unemployment? Re-invent yourself?
Go back to school? Just retire??
My thoughts went to some of my
friends who have already retired. One is getting part time jobs. One is laying
in a hospital bed. One is staying at home with a pacemaker.
Is that what I want?
But the economy is not all there
is to the end of the year.
The season of reflections also
means holidays with food, laughter, friends. Dressing up the house and yourself
to party and travel to family gatherings.
Unless you do not have any
friends. Or family. Then what?
Yes, I could attend gatherings
with associates where the drink flows freely and debauchery continues to entice
the possibilities of a dream soon vanished.
The season of giving, but giving
what? The houses of organized religion wait all year for this month to
decorate, sing, and praise the holiday, but only to those who give to them.
But it makes you feel good to give
an open buffet meal to people in rags for one day and a few scrapes of tinsel
and plastic to children who need an education and role model.
My tradition?
Wake up at sunrise and walk to the
nearest park past the blue glow of TVs in every window. Stand silently. Enjoy
the quiet because the rest of the world is inside their homes opening presents.
Throw a broken pieces from a
couple of loafs of bread to the ground and stand still and watch the gathering
before you. Feather and fur arrive to feast on the biggest holiday, but it is
just a treat for them.
And when the feast is done, they
scurry away. But that is enough.
The walk home is warm and
fulfilling.
So what will you do this season?
Enjoy yourself with new stuff or
have a fulfilling feeling?
It's up to you.
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