How well do you know yourself?
You have a name and you wear a certain style of clothing. You drive a
model car and own a house in a neighborhood that reflects your preferences.
Your kids go to certain schools and you prefer certain foods. You read books by
familiar authors or reviews. You watch movies and television the same way. Your
musical taste only last a few years. You vote a certain way and backup your
bias with social media. You attend certain societies that reinforce your ego.
So who is that in the mirror?
When you meet a stranger how do you introduce yourself? Welcome with a
handshake and a name? Do you say where you are coming from? Do you include a
title? Do you introduce those around you? Do you pass out business cards?
To continue a conversation do you reference the location? How about the
weather? Compliment the clothing or hairstyle? Offer to purchase a libation for
the other?
Getting down to small talk throwing jabs and punches trying to find some
subject of reference can be an adventure.
Where do your kids go to school? Favorite sports? Latest NY best seller
book list or Academy Award winners? Vacation sites? Frequented restaurants or
watering holes are a good talking point?
Old school stories work unless the other person is from a competitive
school. Work stories can bring some chuckles unless the other’s occupation is
not familiar. Just like at the family table on Thanksgiving politics or faith
discussions should probably be avoided.
Health comparisons can form a bonding relationship complaining about
cost and pain, but don’t compare deaths in the family. Pets are also light
subjects that can compare to which alcohol is preferred.
How deep are you welling to go?
How much you house is worth or your salary should not be discussed
unless you need to dominate the conversation. If the other person doesn’t
vacation every winter in the Keys or have a summer home at the Hamptons, the
conversation will take a turn.
A person may reveal a dark side of their personality that is only familiar
to a few but can be shocking to a stranger. A person may not know what they are
saying because it is part of their script that another person hasn’t read.
Would you tell someone you just met about your daughter’s problems with
drugs and living out of a car? Would you tell someone you just met that your
‘partner’ has broken the vow of emotional obligation and psychology ownership?
To understand another person one must dig deeper than the weather and
cough medicine preference. There is an amount of information no one else will
ever know or be able to comprehend. Each and everyone has their own history
that cannot be written on the gravestone.
The rest is perceptions, shared experiences and bias concluding into
your personality to them.
The next person may hid a different chord and have a totally difference
perspective into your life.
Know yourself first and be comfortable with who and what your are, then
be honest with others.
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who is the fairest of them all?
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