Transparency

A typical fall Sunday morning. Sunshine is highlighting a big blue cloudless sky. A cool breeze and refreshing ride after a conversation with a neighbor who thought I was tagging his fence before he turns on his noise machine. Not hungry so I will wait for the afternoon pizza.

I’ve got a couple of thoughts for today.  I will leave one here and put two more on the new “Read Wave” website. Trying to increase readership or at least get some new comments.

Well after two weeks of watching the circus called government go around and around, there is a word that keeps popping up. Transparency. With all the financial wrangling and new health program struggling, the president keeps saying he wants all these processes to be “transparent”. Even the newest voter knows that behind closed doors, our loyal and faithful representatives converse, plan, figure and refigure then check with lobbyist and other financiers for direction. And when elections come around, the poor selection of anyone who wants to join in the party is disparaging.

But the word “transparency” is interesting when put in other situations. Where you “transparent” when you applied for a job? Of course not. You couldn’t tell your future employer about that stack of speeding tickets or your grades were not the best. And when you parents asked you why you were so late coming home, were you “transparent” enough to say you were out being a hooligan and drinking with your parent’s friend’s children?

My real thought about the word “transparency” is about relationships. We tend to kid ourselves when we meet someone we would like to know, that we are honest with them. We tell and listen to tales that could be fact or fiction. If the chemistry works out, the relationship may grow…but under what umbrella?

No matter what contracts we sign or vows me make, we are restless animals always looking. There may be no harm in the long distant email or the smiley face ending or the phone message saved for only you to know. Maybe there is nothing wrong with a late night candlelight dinner or a walk on the beach or even a forbidden kiss that will never come back home? And knowing full well that your partner may be experiencing the same temptations does bring the barriers down.

Are we as transparent as we appear to be? I know from my experiences I tried to be transparent, but it actually scared off the one I was trying to impress. Little-by-little I learned to be more translucent and hide some of the things that did neither one of us good to know.

Today I think I have nothing to hide. Yet I find myself being more opaque than perhaps I would like. Then again, it is probably better that way?