I mean, like, you know….

You know what I’m saying? Probably not so I’ll keep explaining and redefining it until you are so bored you come up with some such uselessness or wander off.

Why can’t we just say it?

I listen to many interviews with intelligent questions and confusing answers. I know part of journalism is to find enough information on a subject or person to ask relevant questions; for that is how we get answers and thus can build an educated consensus of what people know or what people have heard or what people saw. The professional officials have learned the art of ‘govspeak’ with terminology and mixed references full of initials to confuse the listener while the rest of us get all confused under the lights and the cameras and the microphones.

Took a ‘speaking’ class in college taught by an actor. Basically the lesson was ‘think before you speak’.

I’m certainly not as fluent as others in the King’s English but I’ve learned to listen to what people are saying. While my vocabulary cannot compete with some of the words put together by others, I stiffen when I heard people trying to dig their way out of explaining a situation or a thought.

Some feel it is better to keep repeating a thought over and over so the listener can understand; like speaking louder to a deaf person. No matter how many times you say it, your dog won’t know what you mean. Hand waving may help to confuse the situation or create space between the speaker and the listener.

If one focuses on unintelligent speak, the constant ‘ah’ or ‘I mean’ or ‘sigh’ can become bogged down in the pattern instead of the message. A current pause has been using “That’s a good question…” to allow the speaker to gather their thoughts. The ‘ah, well….ah, I mean, ah, this was like, ah…” means the speaker is grasping for a thought or a complete sentence leaving the interviewer or journalist filling time with empty space.

Some are very good at quoting others and referencing previous sayers rather than coming up with an original answer. A form of smoke and mirrors deflects the question without an answer.

It must be frustrating for a researcher to question and only get enough dead space to shut down and move on to another. The same is with print media and video where there is so much ‘noise’ and little substance. Throw in enough ‘fake’ news and there are no answers.

In a face-to-face conversation I strive to listen and learn from another. They maybe better versed in the subject or need some space to present their point-of-view. Unfortunately like the trained journalist I cannot wait for the end of the sentence. Much like formal schooling, I felt I knew the answer before the question was finished. It is rude behavior and I work to restrain myself.

“I mean, I really want to listen, like you know what I’m saying, to listen to you because like I’ve said it is really, really interesting to me and did you hear about Sally and her boyfriend, like I mean that is so the same as….”