Thursday, January 19, 2012

Living Apart

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Variation to a theme I’ve already written, but it is just that, a realization of the inevitable.

As a species we seem to gather with needs of association with like kind. Our individual needs interaction with others.

We seem to need to share like experiences to explore new ventures. There is a desire to let loose what we hold inside.

So our being seeks one who will feel comfortable with our own evaluation of the life experiences presented to us with a feeling that it is meant to be a comparative emotion.

With the discovery of a like mate to cohabitate with, the compromises come whether wanted or desired but necessary to continue the relationship.

And yet the individual wonders?

For each has desires and dreams that may not be included in this new coupling.

Is the grass greener on the other side? Was it better before we met?

Yet some relationships have complications. Finances are shared, furniture has been purchased with acceptance, and then there are the begat.

The struggle to find a common ground to make life tolerable sometimes leads to the realization that perhaps being in the same space is not the best way to be.

Work offers many opportunities for getting into a separate space at least for a few hours. Travel and long hours softens the long distance and with continuous repetition becomes common to the relationship.

Sometimes the distance is not so far away but yet necessary. The arrangement can be as easy as a dinner together then parting for the evening in different directions or a shopping incursion only to separate in a nap and a football game.

The excuse may be the time needed to have self-relevance or to contemplate the soul or to exercise the creative venture interrupted.

This is not a bad thing; it is just that we, as individuals, must have a certain amount of space to be able to understand our own consistence.
 
It is not we don’t feel compassion and whatever that other emotion is for the other person we share space with, but each of us need a certain amount of time alone to contemplate the world around us.

Trust me, this time is valuable to each of us and should not be jealous.

Knowing each individual has certain feelings and likes and desires which can somewhat intertwine with each other, enjoy the time together in the shared experiences, for they are fleeting and will only be memories.

1 comment:

Art said...

Good points. I have often termed this "parallel play" (a concept about toddlers who can be in the same room and playing, but not with each other). Melissa and I do a lot together, but we also do a lot alone... it's simply nice to know that each other is 'close', and we try hard to sleep together each night.