Sunday, April 16, 2017


Now that the spring season is coming on shaking off the winter blahs and bringing on the warm yellow snow, it is time to understand what is happening in your environment.

When you enter the kingdom of Puppywoods, as a tourist you should know what events occur here and the players who make this a special wilderness of constant joy and entertainment.

The cast of characters:

Grey Jay: Not actually a Perisoreus Canadensis but a Grey Catbird, Dumetella carolinensis, but the name has stuck. Migrates from Florida to Puppywoods then back again at the end of summer. Something mystical about this bird that is very familiar. 

Petie (aka Yard Monkey): Grey squirrels, the most populous of Puppywoods. 

Robben: Not to be confused with Mr. and Mrs. Robin, but a rouge Petie who brazenly walks into the studio to gather more grub when supplies are low outside. After some stern talking too he always gets his way and waddles off with his prize. I like Pirates. 

Beau-Beau (aka Scooter): Black striped brown ground squirrels, chipmunks. Descendents from the original Beau-Beau, the roommate of my first wife, who escaped his plastic palace and entered the wilderness that was to become Puppywoods. Several families live in different directions. Beware, they will run you over. 

The Ladies: Morning doves. They bring the song of the start of the day and provide a bit of properness to the rag-tag bunch that inhabit here. 

Mister and Misses Robin: The Commonwealth’s Official bird since 1950. Hangs around all year. Especially touching how he will get some seed and then take it to his mate. Colorful couple who hang tight and never cause any trouble. 

Bluejay: The warning system for the yard, peanut fancier. For such a large and loud bird, he is a big chicken and the first to run. 

Woody: Two different types of woodpeckers come around to keep the beat. 

Al: Barred Owl, very proper and can look right through you with those large eyes. Seems to be somewhat wise yet feels comfortable enough to rest here during the day. You will never hear him leave, but he announces when he arrives. He gets the respect he so deserves. 

Ollie: Al’s old lady. Interesting to hear them talk to each other. Don’t be messing with her or you get Al’s wrath. 

Mister Hawk: There is a large one and a small one who scan this area, neither are welcomed at Puppywoods and will be chased away. They don’t come around when Al is here. 

Mister Vole (aka Lil’ Dodger): one of our smallest residents. He doesn’t cause much chaos but pops up in darndest places. 

Black Cap:  A feisty Chickadee that loves sunflower seeds and will take on any opponent, no matter the size. 

Possee: The quiet slow opossum that wanders through now and then but is mostly a night visitor. 

Rocky: The masked striped tailed bandit who comes through in the dark rummaging through the shadows. 

Bun-Bun (Mama, Bun-Bun(s), baby Bun): All the white cotton tailed bunnies, various sizes. Mama is the Official Puppywoods Yard Boss. Sleeps in the sunshine and tall grass, hides in the ivy and stays dry under the studio when it rains. Are fond of blueberries. 

Ratboy (aka Ratzo Rizzo aka Ratty Mac Ratface): All critters with feathers and fuzzy tails are welcomed to Puppywoods, but not this guy. [Editor’s Note: I live in a city. I know that it is full of rats. At night and out of sight they can do what they do but during the day they are NOT invited to the buffet.] 

KAT: Also unwelcomed to Puppywoods. [Editor’s Note: There are fewer cats wandering the neighborhood but when one is sighted they are chased away to break the habit of their natural hunting instincts, at least in this spot of ground. Puppywoods is a designated park for wild creatures to run and play in the safety of its confines.] 

Clean-Up Crew: At dusk, a variety of wrens, chickadees and other assorted feathered visitors are invited to finish off the daily buffet. 

Frick & Frack: The two Peties who are constantly chasing each other around the grounds and up and down the trees.

Bike Buddy: A little rolly-polly nuthatch that between catching spiders rest on the bicycle handlebars. I think he’d ride off but his legs don’t reach the pedals. 

The Crows (aka The Holy Trinity): The three crows, Sheryl, Russell, and Counting, make a lot of noise and chase Mr. Hawk. They also clean up leftovers, like Possee and Ratboy. Always looking sharp in their black gloss undertaker coats. 

Eureka & Hoover: Two Beau-Beau partners who can clean an area quickly filling cheeks and scurrying off to unload and return for more vacuum duty. 

Flutterby: The colorful flowers on the wing.
 There are many, many more characters too varied to number each with their own activities, noticed or unnoticed, that make this a sanctuary wilderness for native life.

“There you go”: Approval of grabbing a peanut or seed or blueberry.
“Hello Ladies”: Formal welcome to the doves.
“Get A Peanut”: Instructions to the newly arrived Blue Jays.
“OK guys. Come and Get It. Soups On”: Announcing to the yard the buffet is open.
“Good job”: After a Bluejay warning of danger that gets me out in the yard to chase away any threat. Usually followed up by a treat of peanuts.
“Scoodly Doo”: The skipping patterns of critters playing.
“Zoom”: The sound of the scooters zipping about.
“Pisssssss”: Shoo cat noise. (ps. This really works)
“Tich-tich-tich”: Walk slowly through the yard with this sound to announce your movement without danger to those sheltered.
“Roll & Tumble”: The wrestling (or more amorous interaction) between critters. Some are moves by the alphas to establish their dominance while others are just good-natured play.
“Ooop!”: When one critter gooses another critter making them jump into the air.
“Stick”: A favorite Petie game of grabbing a stick and rolling and tumbling with it then running off only to return moments later and jumping on the stick again. Followed by the sound of “Grrrrr”.
“Hello”: The formal welcome acknowledgement to everyone from a moth to a spider to a butterfly to the moon. The proper society approved welcome as oppose the Carolina vernacular of  “Hey”.
“Mess Pots”: When the critters are acting silly.
“Raining Peanuts”: When the critters are munching down on seed and they see me and hear the rustle of paper their forecasters say, “It will be raining peanuts”.
“Blueberry Time”: Normally at 3PM and 5PM, fresh blueberries are placed in a constant spot and announced to all around “Blueberry Time”. Bun-Bun’s and Robin’s favorite, but a special treat to all.
“Put Up Your Umbrellas”: Informing the Peties it is raining and fold their tails over their heads.
“No, not that way, follow me”: When a bird flies into the studio and tries to fly out through the skylights. Stay calm. Open the door wide and walk out on the porch while talking quietly. After some panic and frustration they figure it out, fly to freedom and have a great story for the family that night.
“You Got Your Hungries On”: When the critters stand around the feeding ground before the buffet is open.
“Cutie Pies”: They can’t help themselves from being adorable.
“Cool The Tummy”: Critters way to cool off. Lie flat on a cool shady slate or some mulch to chill from all the antics of running around on a hot day.

Now you know the cast of critters and the script, walk softly as not to disturb for this is their territory and we are just visitors. Keep your hands behind you and no sudden movements or noises. Stop occasionally and just look up. Stand still a few minutes and listen to the activity going on around you. You can’t see it but it is always going. Take time to observe an area and suddenly you will find camouflaged nature provides a social network no Internet can compare to.
As caretaker I will try to provide the basics so nature can have the freedom to continue. In the meantime I get unlimited entertainment and unexpected antics from this cast of characters.
Thank you for the privilege of providing you with space and necessities to allow me what people take vacations to national parks for.

Saturday, April 15, 2017


I’ve been accused of being cynical? Let’s see if that is true.

Cynicism is defined as an attitude or state of mind characterized by a general distrust of others’ motives. 
Sounds sort of paranoia but I can agree with that so far.”
A cynic may have a general lack of faith or hope in the human species or people motivated by ambition, desire, greed, gratification, materialism, and goals. This opinion that a cynic perceives as vain are therefore deserving of ridicule or admonishment. 
Yes, I suppose what others hold as valuable or amenable I demolish as trash and unworthy of acclaim.”

A common misapplication of this cynical attitude involves its attribution to individuals who emote well-thought-out expressions of skepticism. 
Hummm? Go on.”
Such miscategorization may occur as the result of either inexperience and/or a belief system in which the innate goodness of man is considered an important tenet or even an irrefutable fact. 
Who said that ‘man’ (human) was inherently good?”
Thus, contemporary usage incorporates both a form of jaded prudence and (when misapplied) realistic criticism or skepticism
Jaded? Is that now our bias built upon life’s experiences?”

The term originally derives from the ancient Greek philosophers, the Cynics (“I saw them at the Fillmore in ’70”), who rejected all conventions, whether of religion, manners, housing, dress, or decency, instead advocating the pursuit of virtue in accordance with a simple and idealistic way of life.  
Is this not anarchy more than thumbing your nose to conformity?”

By the 19th century, emphasis on the ascetic ideals and the critique of current civilization based on how it might fall short of an ideal civilization or negativistic aspects of Cynic philosophy led the modern understanding of cynicism to mean a disposition of disbelief in the sincerity or goodness of human motives and actions. What is your flavor today? Saving puppies? What happened to the seals and whales?”

Modern cynicism is distrust toward professed ethical and social values, especially when there are high expectations concerning society, institutions, and authorities that are unfulfilled. 
Do we all not question in our rebellious youth the rules and regulations handed us without our input?”
It can manifest itself as a result of frustration, disillusionment, and distrust perceived as owing to organizations, authorities, and other aspects of society. 
I do not sign petitions or walk on protest marches or even donate time or money to causes for I don’t believe they are making a different either.”

Cynicism can appear more active in depression. Cynics are sometimes accused to be “borderline melancholic’s”, which can keep their symptoms of depression under control and yet retain the ability to work, whatever might happen. 
Melancholia? I can understand that. Most of us are distracted from our own wants, dreams and desires by the rudeness of life so I understand melancholia and maybe have experienced depression.”

One active aspect of cynicism involves the desire to expose hypocrisy and to point out gaps between ideals and practices.  
I’m onboard with that so that must be me.”

George Bernard Shaw allegedly expressed this succinctly: “The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who don't have it”.  
“Why quote a playwright here?”

A study published in Neurology journal in 2014 found a link between “cynical distrust” (defined as the belief that others are mainly motivated by selfish concerns) and dementia. The survey included 622 people who were tested for dementia for a period of 8 years. In that period, 46 people were diagnosed with dementia . “Once researchers adjusted for other factors that could affect dementia risk, such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol and smoking, people with high levels of cynical distrust were three times more likely to develop dementia than people with low levels of cynicism. Of the 164 people with high levels of cynicism, 14 people developed dementia , compared to nine of the 212 people with low levels of cynicism.”

Skeptical means having reservations. Someone who is Skeptical will not easily be convinced or will be hard to persuade. “Show me the proof. Confirmed disbeliever.”

The main meaning of cynical is believing the worst of people, or as NOAD (New Oxford American Dictionary) says, “distrustful of human sincerity or integrity”. 

“Now after all that nonsense, I must confess. I am cynical. I’m probably a card-carrying cynic. Maybe I’m the poster child for cynicism?  In the seven decades I’ve been aware of my surroundings I have not seen any reason that human goodness is not just a facade. There has always been a war massacring our fellow travelers. We preach of welcoming while building walls. We hold holy vigils and then murder our friends and family. We hold festivals to heavenly ideals that turn into drunken debauchery. We overpopulate due to wanton lust depriving our offspring the opportunities of health, knowledge and freedom to explore thoughts, visions and live dreams.

Being an old codger (which I’ve also been accused) I may not adapt as quickly to the latest fade or folly but I will watch on the sidelines hoping against hope that our species will change. We have created varieties of religions trying to show the rest of society the way, but it has all become another form of politics.

Does that sound cynical?”


The word ‘transition’ has been used profusely in the news recently.

The translation of ‘transition’ is the process or a period of changing from one state or condition to another.

Isn’t that is what life is all about?

We change our hair color, we seek the passage toward the meaning of live, we move from place to place, we transform to whatever mood we are in, we make the reality check between school and work and make the conversion, we metamorphosis during puberty, we have our clothes tailored in alteration, we segue through television serials, we shift our gears, we switch our lovers, we jump the shark, we have leaps of faith, we progress through life experiences, we are appraised or disdained for our development,  and we evolve

So what is this ‘trans’ all about?

We translate words, thoughts and meanings to better understand, we make transactions of our life’s savings into a joint account, we fake transparency but are as hidden as ever, we seen transmissions hoping for the answer and not a reply, we transform our wishes and dreams to comply, we yield yet are translucent, we indulge in our many forms of transportation hoping to get away and possibly come back, we check to see what has transpired but it is only life.

Is ‘trans’ a prefix?

Transgender people are folks who have a ‘gender identity’ or ‘gender expression’ that differs from their assigned sex. Transgender people are sometimes called transsexual if they desire medical assistance to transition from one sex to another.
Transgender is also an umbrella term: in addition to including people whose gender identity is the opposite of their assigned sex (trans men and trans women), it may include people who are not exclusively masculine or feminine (people who are genderqueer, e.g. bigender, pangender, genderfluid, or agender). Other definitions of transgender also include people who belong to a third gender, or conceptualize transgender people as a third gender. Infrequently, the term transgender is defined very broadly to include cross-dressers, regardless of their gender identity.
Being transgender is independent of sexual orientation: transgender people may identify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual, etc., or may consider conventional sexual orientation labels inadequate or inapplicable. The term transgender can also be distinguished from intersex, a term that describes people born with physical sex characteristics “that do not fit typical binary notions of male or female bodies”.
The degree to which individuals feel genuine, authentic, and comfortable within their external appearance and accept their genuine identity has been called transgender congruence. Many transgender people experience gender dysphoria, and some seek medical treatments such as hormone replacement therapy, sex reassignment surgery, or psychotherapy. Not all transgender people desire these treatments, and some cannot undergo them for financial or medical reasons.
Most transgender people face discrimination at and in accessing work, public accommodations, and healthcare. They are not legally protected from discrimination in many places.

Gender / genderless, Androgyne, Bigender, Genderqueer / Non-binary, Gender bender, Hijra, Pangender, Queer heterosexuality, Third gender, Trans man, Trans woman, Transmasculine, Transfeminine, Trigender, Two-Spirit and etc.

A transvestite is a person who cross-dresses, or dresses in clothes typically associated with the gender opposite the one they were assigned at birth. The term transvestite is used as a synonym for the term cross-dresser, although cross-dresser is generally considered the preferred term. The term cross-dresser is not exactly defined in the relevant literature. This definition excludes people “who wear opposite sex clothing for other reasons,” such as “those female impersonators who look upon dressing as solely connected to their livelihood, actors undertaking roles, individual males and females enjoying a masquerade, and so on. These individuals are cross dressing but are not cross dressers.” Cross-dressers may not identify with, or want to be the opposite gender, nor adopt the behaviors or practices of the opposite gender, and generally do not want to change their bodies medically. The majority of cross-dressers identify as heterosexual. People who cross-dress in public can have a desire to pass as the opposite gender, so as not to be detected as a cross-dresser, or may be indifferent.
The term transvestite and the associated outdated term transvestism are conceptually different from the term transvestic fetishism, as transvestic fetishist describes those who intermittently use clothing of the opposite gender for fetishistic purposes.

Long before the use of generic ‘he’ was condemned as sexist, the pronouns ‘they’,their’, and ‘them’ were used in educated speech and in all but the most formal writing to refer to singular indefinite pronouns or singular nouns of general personal reference (which are often not felt to be exclusively singular).
Shakespeare, Swift, Shelley, Scott, and Dickens, as well as many other English and American writers, have used ‘they’ and its related case forms to refer to singular antecedents.  This increased use is at least partly impelled by the desire to avoid generic ‘he’ or the awkward ‘he/she’ and ‘he or she’ when the antecedent’s gender is not known or when the referent is of mixed gender.

However, while use of ‘they’ and its forms after singular indefinite pronouns or singular noun of general personal reference or indefinite gender is common and generally acceptable, their use to refer to a single clearly specified, known, or named person is uncommon and likely to be noticed and criticized.
Even so, use of ‘they’,their’, and ‘them’ is increasingly found in contexts where the antecedent is a gender-nonconforming individual or one who does not identify as male or female.
And although ‘they’ may be used as a singular pronoun, ‘they’ still take a plural verb, analogous to the use of “you are” to refer to one person.

From what I’ve read, there is a ‘transition’ period before ‘he’ or ‘she’ becomes ‘they’.

Personally I’ve transitioned enough and don’t really concern whatever the latest flavor for the month is and myself with the LBGTQXYZ community. A person is a human being, a fellow companion on this spinning ball we all call home and it doesn’t matter.

The person who decides they want to be responsible or perhaps greedy will take the acceptable clothing and walk the walk and talk the talk to achieve their monetary goals. Those who do not want to conform to the norm can migrate to another area hoping for realization of their beliefs, or become strong enough to create a NEW norm, or hide away in the shadows in fear of retribution.

Being from the ‘arts’ community I’ve always had interactions with those who do not conform to the norm. Partly due to the display of creativity and particularly to getting monetary reward from the world for their art, these individuals are flamboyant enough to draw attention to themselves.
Think of the dancers and writers and musicians and painters who had to become celebrities through being flamboyant. Think of the rock and roll musicians you can name without any knowledge of symphony musicians. Who was that bassoon player in the third row?

Sorry parents but you are to blame. You have rewarded your kids for performing wildly to entertain guest and family alike. Home movies bare this out.

But we all want to be acknowledged. From the person who tattoos their face to the shade of lipstick, each is an individual.

Gender doesn’t matter into you have to be separated by the authorities that define you as a ‘boy’ or a ‘girl’. Different teams, different life preparations, different sides of the dance floor are engrained into our psyche. Similar to politics and religion, are you ‘pink’ or are you ‘blue’?

Or are you black or brown or Muslin or Hindu or Southern Baptist or a farmer or a stockbroker or a pipe fitter or an airline pilot, does it matter? We are all here in this big pot of stew called humanity. Why should all the labels matter?

I might be somewhat shocked (or surprised) by a purple Mohawk hairdo or a military uniform or a Hijab or whatever other fashion statement one wants to be described by. It is just vision our of the usual and I get the same reaction by seeing a baby bunny sleeping in the tall grass or morning glories in full bloom. It is the diversity of life and as long as we don’t fear the other, after a transition we can all get along.

It is not the clothing or makeup or the house or car or title that makes the person who they are.

As I transition into old age there is more thought about comfort than ideality impression or even want for acceptance. Different isn’t bad, it makes us individuals.

Just don’t stick it in my face and expect me to accept it or any variation of it. One must take time to transition.

Until we expire.

Saturday, April 8, 2017


There is lots of talk about the idea of ‘Life’ and I wonder: “What is all this talk about?”

I think in my own naïveté philosophy is that this ‘life’ that we wake up to every morning and experience everyday is just that?
We didn’t ask for it. We just arrived and there it was.  

Then there is Pro-Life

Anti-abortion movements, also referred to as ‘pro-life’ movements, are involved in the abortion debate advocating against the practice of abortion and its legality. Many anti-abortion movements began as countermovement in response to the legalization of elective abortions.

Abortion is the intentional termination of a human pregnancy. Life?

By some the terms used in the debate are seen as political framing. The terms used to validate one stance while invalidating the opposition’s. For example, the labels “pro-choice” and “pro-life” imply endorsement of widely held values such as liberty and freedom, while suggesting that the opposition must be “anti-choice” or “anti-life” (alternatively ‘pro-coercion’ or ‘pro-death’).

The Associated Press favors the terms “abortion rights” and "anti-abortion" instead.

However, some in the “pro-life” movement view the term “anti-abortion” as an inaccurate media label as well. For example, not all who would describe themselves as “pro-life” are opposed to abortion if the life of the mother is in certain danger? Also, for many in the “pro-life” movement, the word “life” reflects the core value and truth for which they sincerely believe their causes represents. According to some beliefs, human ‘life’ begins before birth (i.e., at fertilization, when the genetic material which will develop into a fetus first assumes zygote form and acquires unique DNA), and many feel that human ‘life’ is valuable and worthy of protection at all stages. This view is heavily influenced by religious belief in many, but not all cases.

There is significant philosophical debate regarding whether human embryos acquire personhood and human rights upon genetic formation or upon fetal viability.

The ‘right to life’ is a moral principle based on the belief that a human being has the right to live and, in particular, should not be killed by another human being. The concept of a ‘right to life’ arises in debates on issues of capital punishment, war, abortion, euthanasia, and justifiable homicide and, by extension, public health care.

In human history, there has not been a general acceptance of the concept of a ‘right to life’ that is innate to individuals rather than granted as a privilege by those holding social and political power. The evolution of human rights as a concept took place slowly in multiple areas in many different ways, with the ‘right to life’ being no exception to this trend, and the past millennia in particular has seen a large set of national and international legal documents (examples being the Magna Carta and the UN Declaration of Human Rights) codifying the general ideal into specifically worded principles.

Opponents of capital punishment argue that it is a violation of the ‘right to life’ while its supporters argue that the death penalty is not a violation of the ‘right to life’ because the ‘right to life’ should apply with deference to a sense of justice. The opponents believe that capital punishment is the worst violation of human rights, because the ‘right to life’ is the most important, and capital punishment violates it without necessity and inflicts to the condemned a psychological torture.
Human rights activists oppose the death penalty, calling it “cruel, inhuman, and degrading punishment”, and Amnesty International considers it to be “the ultimate, irreversible denial of Human Rights”.

The United Nations General Assembly has adopted, in 2007, 2008, 2010, 2012 and 2014 non-binding resolutions calling for a global moratorium on executions, with a view to eventual abolition.

International law only allows law enforcement officers to deliberately take life (“shooting to kill”) where absolutely necessary to defend themselves and others against an imminent threat to life.

The entitlement of a person to make the decision to end their own life through euthanasia is commonly called a ‘right to choose’, while people who oppose the legalization of euthanasia are commonly referred to as the ‘right-to-lifers’.

The Associated Press Stylebook and Briefing on Media Law guidebook (2000) listing of abortion specifies the publication use of “anti-abortion” instead of “pro-life” and “abortion rights” instead of “pro-abortion” or “pro-choice”, and advises avoiding the use of “abortionist” which “connotes a person who performs clandestine abortions”, in favor of using a term such as “abortion doctor” or “abortion practitioner”.

The term ‘right to life’ is used in the abortion debate by those who wish to reduce the use of abortions and in the context of pregnancy; the term ‘right to life’ was advanced by Pope Pius XII during a 1951 papal encyclical:
“Every human being, even the child in the womb, has the ‘right to life’ directly from God and not from his parents, not from any society or human authority. Therefore, there is no man, no society, no human authority, no science, no “indication” at all whether it be medical, eugenic, social, economic, or moral that may offer or give a valid judicial title for a direct deliberate disposal of an innocent human life…”
--- Pope Pius XII,
Address to Midwives on the Nature of Their Profession Papal Encyclical,
October 29, 1951.

Life must really be precious. It is the only one we have (as far as we know) and it is not easy. We have thoughts of living forever and not only that; we want to stay young in the process.
We take concoctions and potions and pills and lotions to sward off aging all the while not exercising and abusing ourselves with substances to ease our pains and woes. Institutions are fueled with the promise of extending life but it is inevitable. No one gets out alive.

Fathers and mothers give life to their children and vicariously relive their lives through their offspring hoping for a better life and they do the same and the cycle continues. In the end, life is taken away and only the date of birth and the date of death remember the final chapter.

If life is to be cherished shouldn’t we respect ALL LIFE in all species that inhabit this planet with us? If life is so redeemed why do we constantly murder each other for a myriad of reasons?

Are we so hypocritical to preach ‘pro-life’ one minute then barrage ourselves with books, movies, video games, television shows, news reports of maiming, destroying and otherwise removing life from all living species? Does the Good Book not tell us to respect this gift of life and then we crucify the prophet who we worship? Is our ‘pro-life’ philosophy flawed in the creation of our Gods and then taking their lives?

If all our laws and beliefs and rules have exceptions then are they not just a waste of time and paper for another law or belief or rule will come along while we continue to live our lives doing the best we can and hoping for a safe landing.

I certainly have no answers to ‘pro-life’ vs ‘anti-life’ question than the man who seeds a woman in unfavorable circumstances or conclusions or the one that fires the bullet at a brother or sister or the one who cannot coop with the pain and confusion or the one who sticks the needle in while a selected few are chosen to watch. My life is different than your life and his life and her life. We are dealt a hand and have to make our decisions on how to play this game.

Our best imaginative theories no nothing of what came before or what happens after so all we got is a this time in the sunshine and rain to enjoy every breathe and every step and appreciate what goes on around us. LFPHDY.

The ‘Anti-Life Equation’ is a fictional mathematical equation appearing in American comic books published by DC Comics.
In Jack Kirby's Fourth World setting, the Anti-Life Equation is a formula for total control over the minds of sentient beings, which is sought by Darkseid, who, for this reason, sends his forces to Earth, as he believes part of the equation exists in the subconscious.
Various comics have defined the equation in different ways, but a common interpretation is that the equation is a mathematical proof of the futility of living.
The formula is:
Loneliness + alienation + fear + despair + self-worth ÷ mockery ÷ condemnation ÷ misunderstanding × guilt × shame × failure × judgment n=y where y=hope and n=folly, love=lies, life=death, self=dark side

Friday, April 7, 2017

Think I’ll Get Drunk Tonight

No, you don’t plan these things; you just wind up doing it. There was wine in the frig and there was time on my hands. I won’t be the first time. I assume it won’t be the last.
There have been many nights with parties as accuse to party hardy and then wake up the next day paying the piper. Praying to the porcelain God is not unknown.
So tonight after the usual amount of alcohol delivered in tin cans I will reopen the wine provided for a friend during a porch talk and finish it off.
Now wine is just grape juice with a kick and I’ve had the best and the worst. I’ve had the finest and the emptied the boxes.
So tonight with full knowledge I will empty the bottle.
Will this make me be a stumble and a surlier and relive my young life? Not really for experience knows its limits. I’ll probably just go to sleep if I can get back to the house without falling.
Tomorrow I will wake up (maybe somewhat foggy) but I’m a experienced expert on getting wasted.
So tonight might be a new wonder or the same old trip.
See you tomorrow.

Thursday, April 6, 2017

What Are You Afraid Of?

Seems like we are moving back to the 50s. You know the time when everyone was working building cars and refrigerators and houses and raising families and cutting the grass and watching the new fangled television with rabbit ears, but the news reported that the commies had bombs and we had bombs and someone might just get upset and set off these bombs and we would no longer exist.
So our fear kept us sending boys and girls overseas to retain the red menace but we were not really into that. Besides the Nazis and Japs had been defeated and we wanted to know about Lucy and Lawrence Welk and cowboys and somewhat steamy detective paperbacks. The most we had to fear were the black and white rubber monsters on the big screen until the popcorn ran out.
Yet there is always some fear in our lives to make us check the lock on the door twice and look around the corner at the sound of footsteps.
We fear that we will be passed over for the next raise or our taxes will be audited. We fear that we will lose our love to another or the doctor will say he found a fiendish thingy that is not good for our long life expectancy. 
We fear death but know nothing about it. No one has ever come back to tell us what happens so we’ve written these tall tales of wings and harps and pits of eternal fire and misery but there is no science. There is somewhat proof that we all will die because we all do. Why can’t we just face the facts and make the most of it until the end?
Do we fear that boys might be girls and girls might be boys but they both have to pee? Do we fear that someone who doesn’t look like us or talk like us or believe the same as us are our enemy? Do we fear our God? Do we fear ourselves?
We fear the unknown and if the propaganda on the airwaves tells us constantly there is a spooky monster out there and we all should fear it, do we listen. If the message is clear of what the monster is and is repeated enough (check the book) we believe the fear is true.
As we shelter into our mundane lives of locks and guns and laws and regulators and propagators and defenders of our limited knowledge the fear may become real. If we group together to oppose the fear or react without the rational understanding of reality vs. fiction really bad things can happen.
There are some who view fear as an adrenaline rush and climb mountains and bungee jump and drive fast and jump out of airplanes to conquer their obsession against what would terrorize most of the sane folks. Glorification of warfare has those who feel invincible to move from video games to the battlefield until the real bullet hits.
So listening and watching the world events on your big screen smart devices while eating your pizza delivered by perhaps a subversive agent or a member of an organization mapping the neighborhood while your kids are playing video games being streamed to others through their online cameras and your security system is being hacked by your neighbors who wants to borrow your lawnmower forever and your dog’s collar is being bugged by the nice mailman who petted him when you were not looking and the ancient pipes dripping lead particles onto your toothpaste without thinking what is the chemical makeup of your cheese.
Just do like everyone else and it will all be all right.

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Immigration or Invasion?

I’m New Here

“Hi, I’m new here. Can you tell me a place where I can get some food?”
“Sure, where are you coming from?”
“ A very bad place and I am hungry.”
“Well there is Joe’s Taco truck, but watch out for the flies. Then if you have some money, there is Le Cue’s but they are fairly expensive. You do have some money don’t you?”
“I have enough, but I’m looking for something to feed my family before we journey onward.”
“Is that your family?”
“Yes, we have traveled many miles and we are hungry.”
“Where are you going to sleep tonight?”
“I don’t know. I just want to feed my family now.”
“Well there is this place…”
“Thank you I believe we will move on.”
“You are not around here are you?”
“You don’t look like the rest of us or dress like the rest of us.”
“We come from a distant place. A very bad place.”
“But you lived there?”
“Our family and their families lived there before the…”
“So you do have a home to go back to?”
“No, it has been destroyed.”
“Then what are you doing here?”
“We want to resettle and start a new life.”
“Well we didn’t ask you to move here. We got our own problems without a bunch of you guys moving in.”
“We only want a piece of land and some shelter and a place to start a new life.”
“What the hell was wrong with the old place? If you have lived there for generations why did you leave?”
“We were being killed and worst. We only want to raise our families in a safe place.”
“Well, this ain’t the place. We don’t want your kind here. Move on.”

Saturday, March 25, 2017

The Party Next-door

The warm weather is here and it is the weekend. The young man next door has decided to invite some friends over for a party.
Now I’ve been here long enough to endure neighborhood parties. The guy on the corner has a few but they are mainly kids now. The folks behind me used to have super bowl parties where the guys stayed out in the yard with the beer and the grill and watched the game through the glass doors. There were some folks who had memorable parties with loud music but I liked their taste in music. The party got rather rowdy one night. I believe it was the forth of July because in the distance there were fireworks but that wasn’t good enough for this lot. The usual firecrackers that most can tolerate exploded. A few sparklers came out with shouts of enthusiasm. So the master of ceremonies decided to start firing off a flare gun. I feared for the greenery so I called the authorities. They asked if there was drinking? I said yes and they came a running. One car went down the alley to view the festivities and I guess their spotlight irritated someone. A bottle was thrown, more sirens filled the air, and a lawn was caught on fire. Good times.
I’m not a puritan and have participated in a few of these somewhat out-of-hand occasions. I even had “ONE” party in my house that got out-of-hand and expected to get arrested, but this neighborhood is very tolerant of questionable behavior.
For about a decade there have been quiet weekend. One neighbor only came home and then left and never went outside. One couple that moved in didn’t like me being Jesus so they moved out. The other side was an old lady who died and the rotating single people came and went with little noise or bother.
Now there seems to be a couple of guys in their 20’s who like to be guys in their 20’s and party on weekends.
Last weekend was a party at the house next to him and they sort of wandered back and forth. There was a DJ and organized games but then the rain came and they all scurried inside. Quiet.
Today started about noon. Fueled by beer the youngsters gathered and played whatever games the youngsters play nowadays. They didn’t interfere with my chores but I am reluctant to work in the yard separated by a wooden curtain. The yard critters were a bit hyper by the hustle and bustle.
I turned up my music and did a few things then retired to the studio while the sounds merged in my head.
It seems the ladies must yell. Everything they say to each other is in an amped up volume. The guys are fairly quiet in muffled tones until they play games and have to shout during a score. Do they do this during sex?
I am an old fogey and will admit that but I wonder at some of the language I hear. Even with my limited vocabulary it seems that the communication of this generation has to be expressed in ‘potty mouth’.
These charming princesses lubricated with a bit of the hops sound like sailors. The language their grandmothers would spank them for is flowing beyond just an expletive but a statement. It is a uniform language said by all for whatever meaning needed.
Not a prude, I learned the 7-forbidden words but dropped them in middle school when I called some big guy a name and he threw away my basketball. Words have consequences.
Whether used as an adjective, adverb, verb, noun or dangling participle I found other words could be used without offending someone else or myself.
So today the air was filled with the “F-word” and the “S-word” and some “GD-words” but it was flowing so free and easy.
I had just finished a book about Keith Richards and he has a potty mouth. Maybe I just picked up on the language or maybe I stay so alone that I don’t hear these things?
Television and radio ‘bleep’ those words even though you know what is being said. The people who serve me at a dining establish or the tummy temple certainly would not speak these words for fear of losing their employment.
I’ve grown accustomed to the critter’s chirping and yips and squawks which maybe worst than anything we say but I doubt it for I think we have covered all the bodily functions and then some.
Even when I hit my hand with a hammer, since those words are not in my Rolodex, I yell something like “Oh-My-Mother’s-Lawyers” or “Zappa-dappa-dingy-dong-what’cha-gonna-do”.
So this might be an interesting summer listening to low class trash exchange by people who will hopefully grow out of it or not teach their children.
Damn, where did I put my fricking headphones?

Monday, March 20, 2017

It feels good to pee

It is getting that time of warm weather when the clothing will peel off and slap on our shades as we open up to the sunshine and increase our consumption of sudsy liquids. It is a summer ritual as much as getting sunburn.
Now whether we are a professional drinker or just the occasional tipster, the summer is made for beverages poured from tanker trucks taps into red solo cups.
Winter has faded so put away the brandy snifters and the delicate Beaujolais and break out the mugs and tankers for some serious slosh golden foamed headed potions.
Even with all the loud DJs tempting to hop up and down while washing it down, there comes a time when ‘you got to go’.
I will clarify this is all from a male gender perspective so forgive me, but it is what I know best. I believe both genders have the same problem of a bladder bursting but us guys have a few different options due to our plumbing.
There are many pleasurable times in our lives. A warm kitten sleeping in our lap, the coo of a drooling baby, the hug from a grandma, the moment of zygote all bring us pleasure, but my premise on this subject is what gives you the most immediate relief at the moment.
Unlike the climax, a good piss can come often and with such regularity without the need of a partner it is the bodies best endorphin. Depending on your storage capabilities and artistic skills you can write your name in the snow.
Now the seated position for eliminating the body of used up materials usually requires some work and reading material, but that sudden feeling of ‘you got to go’ means a pleasurable moment is about to hit. If we can accomplish the search for the designated room with porcelain vessels to accept our excess and join the crowd for this singular relief appreciated by so many others at the same time then society continues to follow etiquette.
Here again, I try to avoid those blue phone booths for who knows what goes on in there and sometimes I can’t hold my breath that long. Again, some of us folks can just whip it out and go against a tree or into a stream.
Before you get too disgusted think about your country club swimming pool. Why do you think they put all that chlorine in there?
Unfortunately the act of filling and empting and refill usually gets out of hand and the adult beverage makes the logical decisions blurred to the point where falling down and soiling yourself spoils the pleasurable experience.
It won’t be long before you are wearing diapers again.

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Take My Advice….Please

We all do it. “You know what I think?” “My advice would be…”
We can’t help ourselves.
With every bump in the road, a friend or a family member or almost anyone else will chime in with solution, examples, and even theories either confirming or denying our decisions.
So why do we ask for advice?
We think if someone else who is smarter or with more experience might have a better answer than we can come up with to “What do I do next?”
We ask advice to confirm our decisions or suggest better alternative but in all actuality we are self-validating our own intelligence but not all advice is a back-or-white answer.
All through our lifetime we ask the question “Why?”
“Why am I here?” “What is this for?” “Then what do I do?”
Our parents are the first ones who give us advice. They tell us what we should do and what we should not do and most of the time they don’t tell us why.
“Don’t touch the stove” or “Don’t hit a barking dog with a stick” or “Don’t eat that” but we ignore the advice and learn for ourselves they were right.
As we grow older and start having emotional questions that we are affair to ask our parents about, we turn to our friends. This may be our downfall?
A friend may not know anymore about the subject than you do but you feel somewhat safe with the guys you play sports or music or read with. A friend should try and save the relationship but may fumble with advice.
“Should I French kiss her?” “I asked her out but I think she likes…” “What do I do if she thinks she is pregnant?”
The church offers plenty of advice from the book and doctors can give you advice if it itches but for the most part, you are on your own.
This is what growing up is all about.
There are plenty of professional organizations and hucksters who will take your money to point you in the right direction. The Internet is rich with chat rooms and websites filled with questionable comments to your personal questions.
As we drift into the electronic communication a heartfelt question may get an Emoji or a “LOL” as a response. Even a face-to-face visual is limited to battery life.
I take time to listen to conversations. Some are just chatter or filler and some are quick-witted remarks without basis or direction. Should we open our mouths if we have nothing to say?
I try not to give advice. I can only give my own experiences but cannot refute those who have more perceived knowledge on a subject.
I will listen to advice from people I feel offer information that is positive. I avoid the harmful comments yet wonder why people would take the time.
So my advice (if I was going to give any) is just do what feels right.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Breaking News!

NewsO’TheWorld-“Scientist have found appliances can be used for surveillance devices by the enemy”
TimesIzaChanginNews-“Kim and Paris and Pam and Taylor make a surprise movie with Ivanca and Hillary”
OWorldNews-“People of color are not welcomed in the USoftheA unless they done got the hoochie mamas”
TouchMeHeartNews-“Runaway boy steps on mine between the border with Canada. Mother is really mad”
ItCan’tHappenHereNews-“Poor girl bullied in school and broken hearted at the prom with pimples and bad hair is selected to appear in the Olympics after winning the Miss Sexy Universe Contest”
Sports’n’MoNews-“Referee throws in the towel and leaves the game”
FashionThatBeHappinNews-“Same old, same old girls walk up and down a walkway”
ItMustBeTrueNew-“An African car manufacturer has developed an auto that runs on grass”
ScienceAlRightousNews-“Giant hole coming to the core of the Earth”
MoneyTalks&No1ListensNews-“Millions extract their money reserves before the meteoroid hits the planet”
MusicLucusNews-“No one is buying Beatle records anymore”
CookinGoodLookinNews-“Sharing a brownie with a law enforcement official may get you out of jail”
HealthOrNotNews-“Want to look like you were young again? So do we”
It goes on and on and on.
What we read or view or listen to or overhear can be fact or alternative truth.

What will you believe?

AlmostNews-“Zebra with colored strips marches in parade”
FamilyRealityNews-“Baby will poop and mother has to clean it up”
ChewOnThisNews-“Eat enough soap and you’ll blow bubbles”
LoveMeOrI’llDieNews-“You are going to die”
BizAWizNews-“Flash mob of rich folk throw away all their money to live the holiday as impoverished”
JustDangNews-“Man puts a shotgun in his mouth and pulls trigger. We are closely following this story. Authorities have not released details of the victim before notification of family. There are accounts of terrorism. Witness say ******** (censored). More details on this horrific crime and the consequences to the community will be updated to our crew on the scene. Send any pictures or videos to Channel Z. News at eleven”
CommunityUandMeNews-“Convenience Store is inconvenienced by a robbery”
NonOrCentsNews-“Gitmo left the gate open and everyone left”
MotherMayEyeNews-“Cute puppies and kittens romp and tumble”
Don’t go there.