If I Were You ….

Giving opinions is one of the reasons we talk to one another. One person replies to another statements with a similar life experience or personal suggestion. These sharing moments can bond us together forming lasting relationships. Sometimes a life changing moment can be realized by a few words.

To some, the ones we trust with our inner most thoughts, we cherish the comments, sometimes learning while other times are comforted.

Now the closest of friends do not ask deep meaningful questions and expect thoughtful answers as in our innocent youth. The proper response is to participate in a conversation without delving into personal space.

Others may give similar references, but they are ignored or curiously contemplated then discarded.

Some comment to boast of triumphs hoping the other will follow. Some comment to expand in detail a personal reflection. Some will just give an option, whether requested or not, as a sign of knowledgeable prestige.

We seem to enjoy forming other people into our own views. Interpretations of words molded by ones own values do not always match the unknown.

If not this, what else do we talk about?

Politics and religion are out of bounds hitting too many pressure points. Weather, sports, fashion, and entertainment subjects are quickly forgotten as the talking heads on the screen. Family comparisons rewards self accomplishments projected through members of the same clan.

At the end of the day, we separate back into our confines to evaluate, analyze, and perceive others through a word or a phrase.

Perhaps actions are loader than words.

Over the past two years, I have had few conversations, yet I listen more intently. Trying to relate what I know or knew about someone else, I hear easy conversation of clothing, money, transportation, work, and family; but it is not the same. Is there nothing of substance to talk about?

Real meaningful conversation is like love making. You must work slowly into it. If the results are shared, both are fulfilled with a new understanding of one another, but if a common ground can not be found, neither will want for more dialog.

Excuses of time, alcohol, or interruptions attempt to blur the barriers we build around ourselves. Whatever the motive, self preservation or contempt, we do not read our life’s script, we only paraphrase.

Then again, “if I were you, I’d…”