Saturday, October 29, 2011


Last week a strange thing happened.

Sitting with a few friends in a booth at one of the local watering holes, a young blond in a blue dress walked up and said she had been watching us and wished she could join us because she thought we were having fun.

Now get this in perspective.

This woman looked young enough to be a daughter or even a grand daughter but she was smiling and laughing with us ole guys so we appreciated the attention.

Our reactions were interesting if not telling of our personalities at meeting a beautiful stranger.

One went into suave quiet mode like a James Bond character all subtle and demure with his statements while another one went into an open freewheeling mode inviting the attention with smiles and welcoming statements and gestures, both forgetting for the moment they were married.

Me? Well I did what I normally do.

I became obnoxious.

Not harmful or hateful or even loathsome obnoxious, just silly obnoxious.

A slap-stick Jerry Lewis obnoxious, drop a French fry in a beer glass (which she quickly retrieved) obnoxious, a laughing silliness kind of obnoxious

At the brief moment in time, I did not think anything about it as she parted and we continued our conversations and adult beverage drinking.

Only later did I ponder our reactions and realize I’ve been obnoxious for years.

A lack of confidence and self-esteem seems to have formed this behavior over the years. Reviewing my past, I realize this has been my presentation to the world, especially when the unknown is there.

When approached by the informal, we put up a facade to protect our inner self.

It takes us off our usual path and reactions to a scary surprise of our deepest emotions.

These are not ingrained traits born with us, but a survival reaction learned through our childhood. With continuous education and exposure to the world around us, we fall back into a safe mode maybe even a fetal position to cope with change.

So we create methods to cope with the barrage of information and emotions invading our security.

Some have the perfect hair-do while others have a shiny car or a new suit or perhaps the wisdom of studying in class or a famous family name or the possibility of attending a country club dance or massive amounts of money to attract the opposite gender.

For the rest of us, we struggle to get some attention from the fairer sex with whatever means are available.

So if we don’t have the perfect hair or shiny car or family lineage or massive wealth, we make up for our lack with whatever we can concoct to attract attention.

For me it was being obnoxious.

It worked for the Beatles and the Monkees who made a short career of being wild and crazy characters that if you saw them on the street, you would walk away trying to avoid their obvious obnoxious behavior.
But that is what attracted the young girls of the time.

Some called it charm or charisma, but they were just being obnoxious.

So I learned this trait, throwing away years of polite style and grace and indicate and proper training.

And does it do me any good?

Well, I seem to gravitate toward those who make a fuss, the movers and shakers and innovators who don’t seem to be restricted by societies restrictions.

So if you see someone in the room, loud and obnoxious, just smile and respect their effort for seeking contact with the outside world.

PS: Is that Sir Paul?

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