Sunday, September 29, 2013

So I’m Not Your First Choice

There are a lot of compromises in life. There are the dreams and plans that somehow don’t work out exactly as drawn up on the life list.
Perhaps the team didn’t select you to be quarterback? Perhaps you didn’t make the cheerleading squad? Perhaps the school your parents wanted you to attend was not within your reach? Perhaps occupation dreamed about could not be attained and another settled for to provide monetary sustenance for living?
The real compromise in life is whom you choose to love. There is always the dream image of the perfect partner molded by movie stars and celebrity magazines. Then the adventure of dating destroys all the fantasies.
Perhaps the star quarterback or the head cheerleader turns you down for a date? Perhaps your friends start going steady and you can’t find a date for the weekend? Perhaps you find out too late that the girl you would have asked out but was afraid to ask would have gone out with you? Perhaps you hang out with the good-looking people hoping to get the leftovers?
A few may realize the first choice and live happily ever after, but for those who have loved and lost, there is compromise. Hearing about previous relationships doesn’t help bonding but it is a compromise.
Perhaps she isn’t as pretty as you would like, but she is fun to hang with. Perhaps he doesn’t make as much money as you would like, but he is steady. Perhaps she doesn’t get along with your previous friends, but is fun in the bedroom. Perhaps he doesn’t give the emotional connection needed, but supports your ever-increasing habits.
Teach your children. Life is about compromise. That includes love. This way they won’t be shattered when their dream partner doesn’t happen. This way when they look in the mirror years later, they won’t be disappointed they couldn’t have married the one who remains in the dreams.
Just be happy to be second best. Or maybe third.

1 comment:

Art said...

Hmmm, or perhaps relationships are not like a car... 'gimmee the red one, with xm radio and ...yeah, them sporty wheels!'. Maybe it's finding someone that takes you as you are, and that you can take as they are... and you agree to try to come to 'together' buiding on compromise and friendship and love.