Monday, March 20, 2017

It feels good to pee


It is getting that time of warm weather when the clothing will peel off and slap on our shades as we open up to the sunshine and increase our consumption of sudsy liquids. It is a summer ritual as much as getting sunburn.
Now whether we are a professional drinker or just the occasional tipster, the summer is made for beverages poured from tanker trucks taps into red solo cups.
Winter has faded so put away the brandy snifters and the delicate Beaujolais and break out the mugs and tankers for some serious slosh golden foamed headed potions.
Even with all the loud DJs tempting to hop up and down while washing it down, there comes a time when ‘you got to go’.
I will clarify this is all from a male gender perspective so forgive me, but it is what I know best. I believe both genders have the same problem of a bladder bursting but us guys have a few different options due to our plumbing.
There are many pleasurable times in our lives. A warm kitten sleeping in our lap, the coo of a drooling baby, the hug from a grandma, the moment of zygote all bring us pleasure, but my premise on this subject is what gives you the most immediate relief at the moment.
Unlike the climax, a good piss can come often and with such regularity without the need of a partner it is the bodies best endorphin. Depending on your storage capabilities and artistic skills you can write your name in the snow.
Now the seated position for eliminating the body of used up materials usually requires some work and reading material, but that sudden feeling of ‘you got to go’ means a pleasurable moment is about to hit. If we can accomplish the search for the designated room with porcelain vessels to accept our excess and join the crowd for this singular relief appreciated by so many others at the same time then society continues to follow etiquette.
Here again, I try to avoid those blue phone booths for who knows what goes on in there and sometimes I can’t hold my breath that long. Again, some of us folks can just whip it out and go against a tree or into a stream.
Before you get too disgusted think about your country club swimming pool. Why do you think they put all that chlorine in there?
Unfortunately the act of filling and empting and refill usually gets out of hand and the adult beverage makes the logical decisions blurred to the point where falling down and soiling yourself spoils the pleasurable experience.
It won’t be long before you are wearing diapers again.

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