Friday, September 18, 2009


You hear it in the trees. The rustle of dry leaves within as the breezes blow. They have not yet turned colors, but they are getting dry and the creature is withdrawing it’s lifeblood from the limbs to the trunk preparing for the winter sleep.

And the wooden marbles fall creating a feeding ground for the gray yard monkey to gather. As wheels crush the leftover shells like M&Ms.

Yet every morning, there is crispness in the air. The temperatures have dropped and the humidity has lowered to manageable number.

But there has been an anxiety in the morning rides. The same routes seem different, and hills take a new meaning. Going down hills becomes perilous. I squeeze the break as if I had never seen this hill. My back tenses and my mind act as if I had never ridden a bike before and am looking for the training wheels. The front wheel waves back and forth, finding a direction, not remembering the constant path. But with yoga breathing and stretching, the anxiety goes away and the rhythm of the trip continues.

Maybe it’s sleep? Been going to sleep earlier, say 9:00 or 10:00 PM, but waking up at 2:00 AM and rolling and tumbling trying to get another dream until 5:00 AM. My mind races with thoughts of new projects, painting, plumbing, food, etc. Time and thoughts collide between strange dreams. Dreams of work, or at least former work, but not the office I remembered. There are some characters I remember, but there are others I don’t know. And the location has ranged from vacant parking docks, to basements to huge old buildings. I’m sure some mind doctor would have a field day with these, but after being awake, it doesn’t bother me. They are just curiosity’s. I think tonight, I may get up and read for an hour or so to get through this.

I’m thankful to the cooler weather and projects getting done. 3 sewing machines left today but there is much more to do. Trying to stay focused, but the overwhelming amounts of emotions from reading letters and notes and memos have beaten me down.

So Sunday, I’m taking the day off. Going to a hotel and sit in a spa, hot shower, maybe room service and watch the Cowboys and Giants. It will be a different venue and a break from three months of digging.


Art said...

nicely written...

it, head, and heart, ...will take time. And if you need a break, come norte' soon.

LoveBug said...

Sounds nice; hope you thoroughly enjoyed yourself on your little retreat. Don't forget that you have friends in Pensylvania also! You're welcome here anytime...