Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Knock Down Drag Out

They should be making a movie of this “reconstruction”.

Today I took down some shelves in the kitchen to make way for the hot water heater and make sure I don’t bonk myself in the head when entering the room. Sounds like an easy task, but the L-shaped board holders are nailed into the plaster with 3” nails, so the easy claw hammer has to dig in to get a grip.

After half an hour and several holes in the wall, the bent metal and short boards are in the back yard.

So I haven’t sweated enough, I decide to disassemble the 8 foot by 4 foot white laminated surfaced that was designed to stretch material on. Sitting upon a rickety frame built of 2 x 4s, I slide the 1” thick plywood off the frame and rested it up again the “art room” door.

The leaning frame of 2 x 4s was pressed to the floor taking up all the space with wooden legs in all directions and nails protruding at odd angles.

As I started grabbing the wooden frame I was hit by a football linebacker and pressed to the floor with a thud.

There pressed on the mass of wood and nails I had been flattened by the surface leaning against the wall which had been moved by the movement of the wobbly stand and had crashed against my back with a great weight and force.

I didn’t see that one coming.

As I extracted myself from this pile of rubble I began thinking it could have been much worse. I wasn’t impaled on the nails and no bones were broken, but I could have.

A few cuts and bruises and a call to the health insurance agent.

Shake it off, rub some dirt in it and move on.

Oh, and I won.

The table is down and the parts are stacked in the corner.

Another successful day and then off to the old folks day at the grocery store for medicine and fish food. I'll feed the yard p-nuts and seed, then enjoy the first day of Autumn.


LoveBug said...

You need to be careful; that sounds like some scary stuff.

Art said...

yep, don't need to read about you in the Richmond Times-Disgrace

TripleG said...

You'd be a hit on HGTV, DIY Network, Spike (manly adventures), or even E.R.! I'd watch it.

Anonymous said...

In the name of God will you let me help you do this shit? I can't give you a force field, but I can watch your back!