Wednesday, July 7, 2010

On the Market

Antique model, sun roof, gray sidewalls, most of the original parts, all in working order, gets 10 miles on 12 cans of beer, plenty of gas, but back fires sometimes, used and abused but keeps running with a little TLC. No AC but lots of hot air. This is one of a kind available for a short period of time.
But seriously (not really) how would I get back into the market?
It has been 30 years and I’m not sure what has changed. Perhaps people just do sexting over their cells now. If there were face-to-face conversations, what would I small talk about? I don’t know any of the current movies or music or dances (do people still do that?) and I’m easily bored. Maybe it’s all about social networking on the computer? Does that mean the old chat rooms turned to twitting?
If I was to get back in the race, I can only see two options:
1. An old rich woman. I’m not talking about the old lady who got her first (or second) husband’s retirement fund. I’ve got one of those. I’m talking about rich. RICH. I mean Lots of Money. She would have to have piles of scratch, moola, with no end in sight. More money that I could ever spend, no matter how hard I tried. I wouldn’t mind rolling her to her daily naps or even the diapers (well maybe?) if she had that kind of cash. Of course I would be adorable and fed her with applesauce dripping on her bib, but I’d be spending that money the rest of the time.
2. Young Hottie. Yeah right, where is an old fart going to find a twenty something that would be interested? Have you been to any of the clubs recently? Have you seen what these young “ladies” do? So I figure I’ll find one of these wasted wannabes and hook up, get a quickie nuptial, then move in with here rich parents. This way I get the babe and her folks will pay the bills.
So that’s the plan. It’s not much of a plan, but I’m not looking for another ride on that roller coaster. I don’t visit those “meeting” sites or travel to group activities.
I think this time, I’ll just enjoy my solitude.


Art said...

Neither. Cliff, you'll likely date someone "like you" in terms of age and like and (gee, dare I say it) gray hair. And it won't be money dude, it'll be likes and talking and laughing.

Money and 'girls in their 20's' ain't the way to bet.

Cheryl said...

What about a womon who is rich with her own experiences and wisdom about life? Now that would be great, since you're rich in the same ways.

It's no picnic "out here" in the social relm. So far the best men I've found is a burnt out French cheif who couldn't cook anything up, and a boat Captain who's all wet and still hoping his ship will come in.

But solitude isn't your only option. Don't give up yet. You're still as young and good looking as your attitude allows you to be!

My advice: keep your eyes open and speak up when you see something interesting. :)