Sunday, November 4, 2012


You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family.

To declare before I begin, I was part of a family (of course) but never had a family.

Born after WWII probably as a “uh oh” child, I had a set of parents who provided for my education, clothing, substances, value structure, and enough entertainment provisions to keep me out of trouble.

I have no complaints with my growing up in that family, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to have my own.

There is that legacy thing where you pass on to your sires the history of the family name or the accumulation of wisdom and experiences through the generations.

There is also that responsibility thing of providing for your offspring. Perhaps I’m just too selfish so I was always a couple.

Then again, family is what causes the most discussions and problems. The family and the extended families are your first friends and teachers. They teach you manners and the fine points of etiquette, get you out of diapers, take off your training wheels, come to your birthday parties, teach you how to surf before throwing you out of a plane, dress up to go to family socials and religious gatherings, become topics of flattery as trophy awards, and then slowly fade away.

Families also present the crazies and the sweetness of human personality. Though I didn’t learn financial structure through family, money problems can bring families together. Emotional roller coasters can be absorbed by families or ignored.

But with all their swings and sways, families are a large part of what makes you “YOU”.

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