The State of the Onion

January 3o, 2o18

9:ooP.M.

No Tweets today? He must have been busy?

“Mister Speaker! The President of the United Snakes..er Steaks.”

Shaking hands. Shaking hands. Shaking hands. Etc.

Everybody clap now.

“I have the high honor…er, privilege to present to you The President of the United Stakes”

Very swift action. Make America Great Again for ALL Americans. (applause)

The steel in America’s spine.

Coast Guard Petty Officer Ashley next to the FLOUS. (applause)

Firefighter David rescued children in summer camp. Great job. We always will pull through together…always. (applause)

The legion from Louisiana, Congressman Steve. (applause)

Capitol Police officers who saved lives. (applause)

Representatives of the People. Set aside our differences. We need to deliver for the people. (applause)

The State of OUR ONION is Strong, because our people are Strong. Safe, strong, and proud America. (applause)

New jobs (applause)

Rising wages (applause)

Unemployment claims low (applause) specially them color folk (Yea!)

Hispanic unemployment lowest (applause)

Biggest tax cuts and reform in history (applause)

Family of four taxes cut in half (applause)

A lot more take home pay next month (applause)

The “o-care” mandate is now gone (applause)

Slashed the business tax rate so companies can compete (applause)

Average family income increase by $4,000 (applause)

Steve and Sandy from Ohio had the best year of their 20-year business. (applause)

Corey is an All-American worker plans to invest his new job and raise into his two daughters future. (applause)

Apple to hire another 20,000 workers (applause)

Exxon Mobile will make a $50B investment in the US (applause)

If you believe you can achieve anything (applause)

What kind of future we are going to have?

We all share the same great American flag (applause)

Faith and Family is “In God We Trust” (applause)

Celebrate our police, our military and our veterans (applause)

Preston from CA placed 40,000 flags on gravestones (applause)

Why we proudly stand for the National Anthem (applause)

More judges who interpret the constitution as written. Religious liberty and 2^nd amendment (applause)

Veteran’s choice in their health care decisions (applause)

VA shakeup. (applause)

All Americans deserve accountability and respect

Get rid of the riff-raff and hire only the best (applause)

Eliminated regulations and ended the war on beautiful clean coal (applause)

Exporter energy to the world (applause)

Detroit can get motor city reviving its engines again (applause)

It’s all coming back (applause)

They want to be where the action is (applause)

FDA approved more medical drugs (applause)

Terminally ill need to use experimental drugs (applause)

Reduce the price of prescription drugs. Top priority for the year. Watch (applause)

The nation has lost its wealth. Trading will be Fair and reciprocal (applause)

Rebuild our crumbling infrastructure (applause)

10-years to get a permit approved to build a simple road (applause)

Produce a bill for a $1.5 trillion cost to permanently fix the infrastructure deficit. Reclaim our great building heritage (applause)

American heart. American hands. American grit

From poverty to prosperity with Job Training (applause)

Paid Family Leave support (applause)

Reforming our prisons to get a second chance at life (applause)

Open borders have allowed drugs and gangs (applause)

Two families whose two daughters were murdered by MS13 gang who illegally wound up in their high school (applause)

Great people, great, great people in ICE (applause)

Open hand to both parties to protect our citizens of every background, color, creed (applause)

Right to the American dream because American’s dream too. (applause)

DJ…er, CJ has spent years getting gangs off the street. Sent thousand of bad people away. (applause)

We are just tougher than they are. (laughter)

Immigration Reform Package that our country gets what it must have. The four pillars are:

1.    Path to citizenship. (DACA) Show good moral character for 12-months.

2.    Secure the border. Building a great wall and more CJ’s to keep America safe. No more catch and release.

3.    Ends the visa lottery. Merit based immigration system.

4.    Ends chain migration. (booos?)

Safe, modern and lawful system to put America First. Come together and get the job done. (applause)

Opioid drug addition. 64,000 American overdose last year. (applause)

We will succeed. We will prevail. (applause)

Ryan of NM adopted a drug addict’s baby. (applause)

Unmatched US power by removing defense sequester and updating our nuclear weapons. (applause)

Remove ISIS from the face of the earth. (applause)

Army Staff Srg. Justin to clear explosives and applied medical aid to a fallen warrior. (applause)

Terrorists are evil. We must annihilate them. They are enemy combatants. (applause)

Al-Bag Doddy was released, back on the battlefield. Keep GITMO (applause)

New rules of engagement. No artificial time-lines. (applause)

Support Jerusalem as the capital of Israel. (applause)

Foreign assistance only goes to ‘friends’ of America. (applause)

Support People of Iran with their courageous struggle for freedom. Sanctions on Cuba and Venezuela. Pressure on North Korea.

Otto of UVA charged, sentenced, jailed and returned before he died from North Korea. G. Sung Ho was starving boy who sacrificed to become a defector. (applause)

Americans with a revolutionary idea that they could rule themselves. Statue of freedom stands straight. Capitol is the living Monument to the American people (U.S.A.)

It is the People who are making America Great Again. (applause)

Thanks.