Friday, December 16, 2016


I’m done. I’ve had enough. No more can I tolerate.
I’m talking about Christmas music and I’ve had enough.
I’m not being a Grinch for if you like Christmas music, and I suppose you do because it is everywhere you turn during this season, you get in the spirit and it makes you feel merry.
Some of the compositions are very impressive and if performed correctly can be most moving, but I’ve heard them over and over and over again for almost 7 decades and I’ve had enough.
Every year about this time my collection of CD's, mixed-tapes, and assortment of mediums get dusted off and played in continuum for the month and maybe more. Every variation that has been found and a few new ones every year fill my ears with repetitive songs from when Santa ate the cookies and drank the milk to family celebrations trying to disguise the tension.
There is nothing like raising a glass of grog to a hearty singing of “Deck the Halls” but “Little Drummer Boy” done by Buddy Rich or Motley Crew gets tiring after awhile. Songs of Santa, snowmen, sleigh rides and decorating trees are the music that will be put away in the attic and brought back out like a magic potion to make this cold month tolerable with gifts and drink.
It seems mandatory for every musician to have a seasonal song for it seems the public consumes Christmas music. Elvis, the Beach Boys, the Beatles, and maybe Beyoncé (does she have one out yet?) have Christmas tunes to spread the cheer. It is a certain hit on the charts.
Like videos with a puppy playing in snow, a Christmas or seasonal variation will get attention this time of year. Everyone puts on a Santa hat and ugly sweaters to sing these classics like “Jingle Bells”, “Good King Wencesles” and “Adeste Fideles” but versions in heavy metal, big band, reggae, rap, and whatever else don’t make the tunes any better.
So this year, I will play each and every one again, then they go into the trash. If next year I get a hankering for Christmas music, I can go to the mall or turn on the radio or go online or just close my eyes because these songs are engrained in my life soundtrack like “Louie-Louie” and “Stairway to Heaven”.
I will still have to deal with Kim Kardashian singing “Auld Lang Syne” to some nasty selfie or a chorus of the Black Lives Matters march singing “Go Tell It On The Mountain”. Cars will still be zooming through the snow to entice you to purchase them to a tune of “Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer” and I don’t want to think about the bad harmonies of the family around the golden tree in the golden tower. 
So “Good bye” Christmas music; I’ve heard you for years and now I’ve had enough. 
To everyone else, enjoy the spending season of debt with your flashing lights and inflatable nativity scene and enjoy your special music. I’ll be playing Frank Zappa’s “Joe’s Garage”.

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