Wednesday, February 13, 2013

She’s Not There

Continuing on the theme this Valentine week I bring up yet another subject. What happens when she doesn’t feel the same way you do?
Well no one explains all this stuff. There are no rules on how it works. We just fumble through with emotions guiding our way. Sometimes we get connected and sometimes not.
You thought she really liked you until she went for a ride in Tommy’s new car. You thought she was flirting with you until you found out she was just making her boyfriend jealous. You thought she was the one until she started going steady with your best friend.
There are no guarantees to this game. As we roll the dice and take our chances the game continues. Sometimes it seems to work well and other times the connection is frayed or even broken. All the rings and dresses and flowers and candle light romantic dinners do not guarantee continuation.
Life is all about growing and each of us, as an individual, grows sometimes in different directions. That is what makes life interesting but what can wreak havoc in the emotional department and there is no band-aid to put on the boo-boo.
Our ideas change. Our taste in food, wine, likes and dislikes will change. Opportunities, distractions and temptations present themselves along our journey.
Couples are just that. Two individuals with their own separate upbringing and experiences that have decided they want to spend more time together than with anyone else. Yet the value of the other person’s existence in your life may become difficult.
As we grow more familiar with each other the fog of mystery about this other person starts to fade and the individual’s idiosyncrasies become more apparent. No matter what people say, there is always something about the other person that just “ticks you off”. How tolerant are you?
Then the decision, “Do I stay or do I go?”  It may be just a simple breakup or a life changing emotional disaster. Either way the connection is broken.
Or maybe you forgot your password?

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